Comedian and Author Mike Buzzelli
Clearly, I inadvertently stepped out of a DeLorean, a beat up blue police box or a hot tub time machine, because Oct. 31 is more than two months away.
No, it was August and the Halloween candy was on sale. Great Scott, Marty!
I’m going to pass on a little advice from the health experts and personal trainers like Jillian Michaels, Bob Harper and such: The Mini-Snickers you buy today will not be the ones you will be handing out at your door on All Hallow’s Eve.
You will eat the whole bag before then. You’ll justify it by saying, “They’re really little candy bars, or I’ll just break off a bit of that Kit Kat bar.”
Pretty soon, you’ll be staring at empty wrappers.
Then, you’ll be Snickerless, Twixless or sans Reese’s. You will run out and buy more Halloween candy. You’ll probably eat that, too. Then, in late October, right around the time you’re actually supposed to buy it, you’ll have to get more.
On the second, possibly third or fourth, trip to Rite Aid, you’ll finally buy candy you don’t like, so you’re no longer tempted to eat the entire bag. I find Mallow Cups work nicely. Do they still make those?
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Mike Buzzelli is an author and stand up comedian. His book, "Below Average Genius," a collection of humor columns from the Observer-Reporter, can be purchased here: http://www.amazon.com/Below-Average-Genius-Michael-Buzzelli-ebook/dp/B008Y2RDW4/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1408290709&sr=1-1&keywords=below+average+genius